We live in a society where it’s easy to measure our worth against others, which can be detrimental to your self-confidence. In fact, studies have shown that as much as 10 percent of thoughts involve comparing yourself to others.
When we compare ourselves to others, it makes it easier for us to tear ourselves down. If you are struggling with comparing yourself to others, don’t worry, you’re not alone.
I have vivid memories of comparing myself to others from an early age. My dear friend in elementary school had beautiful, long silky hair. Her ponytails would hang down past her shoulders, while my hair was thick and course. Whenever I tried to wear ponytails, my hair would simply puff up. As a result, I yearned for smooth long hair that would drape over my shoulders. Eventually, I realized this was something I couldn’t change about myself so it was pointless to waste my time worrying about my hair and wishing it was different.
Unfortunately, we don’t leave this behavior behind in adolescence. Comparison continues to affect our thinking throughout our lives. Even just a few years ago my husband and I owned a local shoe boutique. One day a young lady came into the store and expressed how much she loved our boutique. “I’m going to open up a boutique just like this one. I want my boutique to be exactly like yours,” she exclaimed. While this was of course flattering, it got me thinking about how entrepreneurs and business owners are constantly comparing themselves to others.
What are the negative effects of comparing yourself to others?
To start, we need to understand how negatively comparing ourselves to others can impact us. When we spend time and energy comparing ourselves to others, it becomes a huge distraction. It can halt your creativity if you spend all of your time obsessing over what others are doing. Self-confidence is affected by comparing ourselves to others. The more we compare ourselves, the greater our self-doubt becomes. Comparison can also lead to feelings of envy and jealousy. This kind of negative energy will only bring you down.
Obviously, having a mindset like this is a recipe for disaster. We look at what others have and forget our individual vision and purpose. Entrepreneurs who lose focus can go into debt competing with others or end up copying their dream and ideas rather than following their own.
What happens when you‘re comparing yourself to others?
Comparing your life to someone else life will wear you out! This behavior can become overwhelming. It’s simply not possible to keep up with everyone else. The only person you should compete with is yourself. Everyone is created differently so it’s impossible to compare two individuals fairly.
God created each of us differently on purpose. He can guide you through life and help you find your purpose. Since every person is created differently, no two people have the same skills, attributes, or abilities. You are an original. Don’t lose sight of this truth.
For example, every beautiful piece of artwork throughout history is unique. While many try to replica paintings or sculptures, they can never accomplish it with the same finesse. A striking painting with vibrant colors dripping down next to each other in intricate patterns cannot be replicated. Similarly, your personality and genetic makeup can never be copied.
Remind yourself this often. Most importantly, focus on your personal goals and dreams and ignore what everyone else is doing. Harness your strengths, develop your passions, and embrace your flaws. You were not created to be the same as your coworkers, friends, family members, or fellow entrepreneurs. Focusing on yourself will empower you to reach your full potential. Once you realize that the only person you should compare yourself to is yourself, life will become more enjoyable. You will be able to overcome your shortcomings and celebrate your successes.
Tips to start living life to the fullest!
There are measures you can implement in your daily life to prevent comparing yourself with others. Only when you give up comparison can you enjoy the life that God gave you. Here are simple steps you can take to start living life to the fullest.
1. Be grateful
First, stop focusing on someone else’s life and spend more time loving your own life. Showing gratitude in all aspects of your life will give you a deeper appreciation of your unique circumstances. There are many things to be grateful for, including your family, loved ones, home, success, health, and so much more. One way to harness your gratitude is to keep a journal focused on your blessings. Take time to write down the things you are grateful for in life. The more you focus on what you’re thankful for, the less you will focus on others and what you lack. Gratitude encourages inspiration and can motivate you to achieve your goals.
2. Find your strengths
Discover your gifts and talents and continue to work on them. Focus on things you are passionate about, not things you think you should be doing. Everyone has different strengths and weaknesses. Focusing on someone else’s strengths won’t help you. Concentrating on your personal strengths will manifest confidence. Start trusting yourself and make an active effort to improve yourself every day. Try new things to uncover your hidden strengths.
3. Congratulate others instead of comparing yourself to others
Rather than becoming envious and resenting others who are successful, find ways to praise those who you admire. If someone is successful don’t become jealous. Choose to sincerely congratulate them. Jealousy is an ugly result of comparing yourself to others. If you can get in the habit of supporting others and encouraging them to find success, you will be better equipped to focus on your personal progress. Kindness and genuine interest can even help you develop new friendships and open doors for your career. We are far more successful when we collaborate with others than when we compare.
4. REPEAT STEPS 1 + 2 + 3
Don’t complete steps 1-3 once and think you’re done. The only way to succeed in changing your mindset is through repetition. It’s time for you to start believing in yourself! Choose today to stop comparing yourself with others and unlock your full potential.
Final Thoughts
The bottom line is that comparing yourself to others will get in the way of your success. Following these tips can help you get on the right path! Once you’ve mastered these tips, check out our blog on How to Become Truly Successful in Life!